I woke up this morning feeling quite okay, well by okay I mean the same as always. Slightly depressed with a mild tone of smiles. I got into school, but in my first two classes there was a lot of bitching about this horrible girl bullying one of my friends and it made me quite upset. At break I saw myself in the mirror and it felt like my heart fell to my stomach, I felt ugly and when I said so to my friend she said nothing other than awkwardly continuing her actions.
At lunch I never ate, because I’m realizing I’m getting fatter lately. I never ate all of last week, but my dad found out, I’m sure because he watched me eat at the weekend. It doesn’t help that our group of friends have that type of humor where you make fun of each other. It is starting to give me a complex.
When I got home I purged (made myself sick) and started feeling lower than usual. It got to the stage I over thought everything at the only way to get it away was to cut. Again. I found my blades while tidying my room and before I knew it my arm was covered in blood more than last time. It gets deeper each time, just to numb the inside pain for a little longer.
kim wbu? 